Double Standards

I didn’t really get it today when he looked at me and said some comment about how R’s appearance have changed.. I didn’t actually get whether the question/comment was satirical or real (because I don’t really see her changed that much).. So I nodded and mumbled in agreement and decided to let it pass.. but later in the coffee break I reflected on it when I saw them standing and joking together, and I understood (or so I think). It just takes me by surprise every time how appearances can deceive a person (both me about him, and him about R).

I always used to get pissed off by his double standards. My first recalled memory of that was our discussion about kissing hellos. I don’t see it an issue (to kiss or not to kiss the other gender hello), but I respect the norms of the society on this matter. He didn’t, and thought that it is weird that people as close as we are (were?) would refrain from doing it just because “someone might say something”. I remember telling him that in his so-called freedom lies the worst judgment of all: that people who are different, who reject this, are prudes! I remember telling him he’s an extremist in his liberalism..

I have double standards worse than anyone. But I don’t deny them.. I have actually told my friend recently that one would think that my experiences have changed me, taught me a lesson and made me wiser re judging people, and they have but I still judge. I just do it with more awareness now, premeditated judgment! And I know that I am judged too, so yeah whatever.

And why on earth did Edith Piaf start playing now?! Non, rien de rien.. non, je ne regrette rien..