So, the story goes that we (I, my friends, etc etc, not necessarily the reader who might not know me!), we have come of an age where we are getting -slightly- wary of being single.. yes I know independence and freedom and career woman and what have you, but at the end of the day, you really look for companionship and partnership and a witness to your life and the works.. add to this the natural human (or universal) instinct to leave an offspring, and we've got a recipe for disaster!
but first let me give you a little background.. the theory basically is that, let's face it, our resources are really limited, all the good ones are taken, only the freaks remain etc etc, you hear it all the time!.. so when a girl finds a "hot shot" (as i like to call them), or at least what she _believes_ to be one, she latches on to him like there is no tomorrow! am not judging 1) the need for a partner, 2) the "latching" technique, 3) how the guy's hotshot-ness increasing exponentially with the lack of options, or 4) the fact that there is no tomorrow if she misses out on this one.. what I am dicussing is what happens when the latching for one reason or the other doesnt work and the guy is back to the demand market..
now the funny (sad? ironic?) relationship scene that I've -perhaps unwillingly- become part of have introduced a new hook-up methodology:
I proudly present the "Are you gonna eat this?" technique..
You know when you're out with a friend and they order some meat dish which comes with a side of broccoli or asparagus, something you really like, and you find them pushing it around the plate to make room for their meat eating rituals.. the typical reaction -if you two are close enough- and if you dont mind this, that you will go like "are you gonna eat this?" and you'll just go on picking the food from their plate..
This is exactly what I am talking about.. your friend leaves her food (or -lets admit it- sometimes the "food" leaves her), and you find yourself eyeing it with thoughts of -for lack of a better term- hunger.. going like "hmm it doesnt look too bad, ok so she took a bite but so what, its not like she bit it off, she used a knife and all.. and after all its not so soaked with the sauce, and it didnt get too cold to eat it yet.. I think I am going to have it, better than it being thrown away"...
the friend's reaction would now be:
1)
But I was going to eat it: suddenly she becomes a fan of the broccoli she was _just_ dissing!
2)
How can you have the broccoli that turned ME down: we start the drama-queenish act of "how can you do this to me after what broccoli did to me", "didnt you know I love broccoli", etc etc.. you need to really a) love the broccoli or b) be desperately hungry, to go with this knowing she will give you this attitude
3)
Go ahead, have it: you need to watch out for the tone of this one because it can be sarcastic, bitter, or sincere, based on the friend's relation with broccoli in particular, and other vegetables in general.. it can be summarized in:
a) it tasted funny and I was throwing it away anyway: the bitter or cynical tone can mean she is either too proud to say she wants her broccoli, or that she really doesnt want it but still feels bad about someone else having it, orb) I wasnt going to have it, and you know what broccoli is like, so if you still want it, be my guest: ideally, that would be the best case scenario.. but ok, it rarely happens! :D Ideally, you shouldve ordered your own broccoli if you liked it so much.. but as someone once told me "it shouldnt have been this way but that's the way things are"... hmmm, I think I will go off veggies for a while then.
and this concludes my theory..
N.
p.s. thats my very first blog template.. is it more readable? do you even care?
